Tuesday, April 10, 2012

The (un) Music Man

Mitt Romney has taken a lot of heat for being politically tone deaf. He likes to fire people, he makes big bets, he doesn't worry about the poor and don't forget that tree height fetish. Well, I can't say that it has bothered me, in fact, it makes my job that much easier. But anyone who's heard him sing knows he's literally tone deaf as well, and that spells trouble. (With a capital T that rhymes with D that stands for Dems.)

You might think that Mitt's tin ear would be good for the Democrats. We've all seen the president rock with Mick Jagger and croon some R&B to Al Green. What could be better than that kind of contrast, you ask? Let me tell you.

Most of us can't sing. We don't admit it, and we don't talk about it, but few of us could hit a note with a shotgun, or carry a tune in a tote bag. It's common knowledge that people vote for the candidate they would be comfortable hanging out with, perhaps even having a beer with. I don't know about you, but after knocking back a few at my favorite pub, there's nothing better than singing some songs from the "auld sod" that would make your average Englishman run and hide. And, while we get points, (and citations) for volume- none of us can really sing, and we'd be mightily pissed at anyone who showed us up with a good voice. Mitt would fit right in on that score. Of course, he doesn't drink, and he's Mormon, so he wouldn't be welcome anyway- but I think I've made my point: Barack Obama is part of the melodically elite- the lyrical one percent, if you will.

This election could be very close. If the musically challenged have their way, Obama is gonna be singing the blues.







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