Go, Marco, Go

  Tonight, after failing to even come close to winning his home state, Marco Rubio left the race.
  It is important to remember that Rubio will be able to run again and again, after he grows up.

The Road Not Taken

  As a political satirist of some renown, (I must have at least some, don't you think?) I aspire, as do most of my colleagues, to the heights; the rarified air wherein exist the like of Voltaire and Jonathan Swift, Mark Twain and George Orwell. But that's a fucking lot of work. I tend to accept less lofty results, which give me much more time to sleep late. I've found, though, that I am not alone on my chosen path.
  Marco (Gunga Din) Rubio has shown us he thinks that his path to the presidency is as an insult-comic. He went after Trump for his Ooompa-Loopa spray tan, and his small hands. He neglected Trump's comb-all-over, and his surprisingly small mouth.  Yeah-- for all the noise he makes, Trump actually has a tiny little mouth. In fact, whenever he's emphasizing a point, his upper lip contorts into a shape usually associated with the parrotfish or your average parakeet. It actually looks beak-like.
  I may be stealing the thunder from Rubio's next set, but if you're going to go there, then just GO THERE. Donald Fucking Trump not only lives the low road, he built a lot of it.

These Just Out....

  Rand (Son of Ron) Paul dropped out of the race for president today. Once considered a real contender....
 
  Rick (santorum) Santorum also dropped out of the race today, although he vowed to spread his...uh... magic over Marco Rubio. I am sure the Florida Senator relishes the endorsement.

  In a related incident, Ted Cruz called the Donald's whining after his loss in Iowa a "Trumper-tantrum". This type of cheap shot barely even qualifies as sophomoric. I resent the competition.