Not from Nantucket

Priebus, McConnell, and Ryan
Said; "We really ought to be cryin'
Because Donald Trump's
Made us all look like chumps
But if we said we were sad we'd be lyin' "
   Christopher Mahon

I Am Not Shitting You

Today, the British parliment debated whether to ban Donald Fucking Trump from entering the country.

Not So Super

  "I have, like, this incredible vocabulary."
                                 Donald Trump, December 21, 2015
   "Fershur. Totally."
                          Your Blogger, just now

Update (A continuing tradition of rhetorical eloquence):
    "Her statement changed bigly."
                                 Donald Trump, March 29, 2016

  It is, rightly, said, that there can be too much of even a good thing. It must also be said that there are, of course, a few things of which there never can be too much. Off the top of my head that includes: beer, redheads and chocolate. Although not necessarily in that order. But definitely in combination.... Yes.... Definitely in combination.
  I digress. But, yeah, in combination....
  Right, where was I? Oh yeah, too much of a good thing.
  In oratory, as in writing, the impact of a superlative is directly inverse to its frequency of use. The more often a word is used the more commonplace and insipid it becomes.
  Which brings us back to Trump.
  Traditionally, there have existed two kinds of political speakers; the man of few words, and the great orator. For a man of few words, whatever he says, due to the laws of supply and demand, seems to have more substance. A great orator, on the other hand, can speak often, and at great length, if, like Winston Churchill, he can draw his thoughts and phrases from a deep well. Trump is neither of these. He speaks often, and at great length, but his supply comes from, at best, a stagnant puddle. He is a man of few words, repeated endlessly.
 
Herewith; a Trump lexicon:

Great, nasty, terrific, horrible, amazing, disaster, powerful, important, awful, tremendous, disgusting, incredible, terrible, and, of course, yuge.

  Throw a handful of random nouns and verbs in with the above, stir well, and you have a pretty typical Trump paragraph. It might even make an interesting drinking game. With beer... and redheads.... Well, once again, I digress.
  We must still see how the primaries shake everything out. But, as I said once before: schadenfreude.

Another One Bites the Dust

  Bobby (Lucky to have made it to Governor) Jindal has dropped out of the presidential race.
  He will be missed- by those of us who noticed that he was running.

Help! I've Fallen, and I Can't Get Up!

  Rick (Under Indictment) Perry has left the race. He will soon be followed by more also rans who also haven't run very well, but Perry will be missed. He was the first person ever to run for president while under indictment, so we will never know how he would have handled both a campaign and a trial.
  It would have been both interesting and stomach turning.
  I, for one, am sorry we'll miss it.
 

Everything's Trumpy-Dory

  Donald Fucking Trump signed the Republican oath of fealty today.
  Republicans everywhere can now breathe a sigh of relief that Trump won't be running against them.
  He'll be running with them.
  Isn't that wonderful?

Dead Party Walking

  The RNC, in their infinite wisdom and incredible desperation, have put out a loyalty oath, to be signed by the plague of candidates running for president. Though the entire swarm is being 'asked' to sign, everybody knows that the real target is Donald Fucking Trump, who for some goddam reason leads the rest of the gaggle in all the polls, yet still refuses to rule out a third party run.
  Loyalty oaths.
  The weakness and fear the Republican party is projecting now is palpable.
  I think the only thing that could possibly top the pathetic, despondent hopelessness we are seeing, would be to- I don't know- commission an autopsy.
  But that would be ridiculous.

Fifteen Little.... Oh Fuck It!

  As of this writing, there are now seventeen people running for the Republican nomination for president. And, as of this writing, that number is irrelevant. Not because they espouse a political ideology that is obsolete and morally bankrupt- well, not only because of that. The reason they are essentially toast from the get-go is Fox News. Fox is hosting the first debate with only the top tier of the top ten candidates. With their usual integrity, they fudged the math to get John Kasich a seat at the table (more accurately, a stand at the lectern.) Since the debate's in Ohio, who could blame them for getting its sitting governor a shot at it.
  Kasich's spot came at the expense of Rick (currently on trial) Perry. Perry is famous not only for his 'oops' moment in the last race, but also for apparently falling in love with a bottle of maple syrup onstage, during a speech. (How's that square with your obsession with man-dog marriage Justice Scalia?) Also left out of the debate is the man who was number two (in both senses) during the last Republican primary, Rick (santorum) Santorum. Several campaigns, including Santorum's may run out of steam before the first race even starts.
  The biggest and saddest, most pathetic news is this: Donald Fucking Trump is still the leading contender.
 
Note: The Washington Post Reported that Bill Clinton spoke to Trump about politics back in May. It seems that Trump reached out to Clinton, and according to a Clinton insider, the campaign was not discussed. That being said, if Bill Clinton did happen to help Trump decide to run, he deserves to go down in history as the greatest political strategist of all time.

...By Any Other Name...

The right-wing has been excoriating President Obama for refusing to use the words 'Radical Islamic Terrorists' when referring to ISIS, and other enemies. They point out, quite rightly, that only by using the proper name can our enemies be defeated. This, of course, is the highly effective "Rumplestiltskin Strategy', in which, immediately upon saying the name, the earth will open up, and demons will drag them to the pit of hell- as happened in the aforementioned story. And, as any child knows, the only possible counter to the Rumplestiltskin Strategy is the 'Sticks and Stones Gambit', which must be used immediately if it is to have any effect. As Republicans are aware, the enemy lacks the sophistication necessary to successfully deploy such a defense, and will therefore be defeated. Would that the president would only see the light, and bow to the collective wisdom that is today's Republican Party.


Side-note:
The destruction of Ol' Rumplestiltskin, and his cool weaving-gold-cloth-from-straw factory, deprived us of one of the most exciting and innovative start-ups in the history of folk-lore. I, for one, will always regret never being given the chance to wear gold-woven tube-socks