Carved in Stone

  Two American tourists were arrested in Italy for allegedly carving their names into the walls of the Coliseum. Good. It is wonderful to see the preservation of history, rather than the defacing and destruction of it.
  Such vandalism was once the norm for tourists. The Temple of Dendur, which now rests in the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York, is covered with carved names from the 19th century. Mark Twain made the following observation, and wish, in Innocents Abroad: " One might swear that all the John Smiths and George Wilkinsons, and all the other pitiful nobodies between Kingdom Come and Baalbec would inscribe their poor little names on the walls of Baalbec's magnificent ruins, and would add the town, the county and the state they came from- and swearing thus, be infallibly correct. It is a pity some great ruin does not fall in and flatten some of these reptiles, and scare their kind out of ever giving their names to fame upon any walls or monuments again, forever."
  The bitterest irony, of course, is the complete, and deliberate destruction being committed by the reptiles of ISIS, while the case in Italy plays out.

Quote of the Post

"We used to spend money we earned hoeing at a raspberry farm to send away for books we saw advertised in Argosy or Stag or True magazine that would give us what they called secret powers. If you're hoeing raspberries for thirty cents an hour in the hot sun what you want is secret powers."


Jim Harrison, Brown Dog (novella)


Harrison is also the author of the novella Legends of the Fall, which I have yet to read, as it is not shelved at the library branch that I patronize.

...By Any Other Name...

The right-wing has been excoriating President Obama for refusing to use the words 'Radical Islamic Terrorists' when referring to ISIS, and other enemies. They point out, quite rightly, that only by using the proper name can our enemies be defeated. This, of course, is the highly effective "Rumplestiltskin Strategy', in which, immediately upon saying the name, the earth will open up, and demons will drag them to the pit of hell- as happened in the aforementioned story. And, as any child knows, the only possible counter to the Rumplestiltskin Strategy is the 'Sticks and Stones Gambit', which must be used immediately if it is to have any effect. As Republicans are aware, the enemy lacks the sophistication necessary to successfully deploy such a defense, and will therefore be defeated. Would that the president would only see the light, and bow to the collective wisdom that is today's Republican Party.


Side-note:
The destruction of Ol' Rumplestiltskin, and his cool weaving-gold-cloth-from-straw factory, deprived us of one of the most exciting and innovative start-ups in the history of folk-lore. I, for one, will always regret never being given the chance to wear gold-woven tube-socks

One Little, Two little, Three Little...

The countdown to 2016 has begun.
Mitt is out.
Before he was really even in, now he's out. Of course, if truth be told, he was out even when he was in.
So, from the point of view of a poor writer of satire, he will be missed.
From the point of view of an American citizen who wishes for a good future for his country- not so much.

...Don't Bother, They're Heeeere. (I Hope)

Sarah Palin seems to be thinking about running. She's putting in an appearance at Steve King's Iowa Extremist Summit or whatever it's called.
Palin is there alongside Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum and Donald Trump.
To the possibility that all these less than qualified individuals may seek the highest office in the land; I say: pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Messed Metaphors

The following quotes were actually spoken. Aloud.


Representative Steve King talking about trying to get the Mittster to an event of his:
"He may not be able to come to our event because of scheduling conflicts, but he knows the door is open and we made sure we rang the doorbell."(1)


Sure. They opened their own door. And then they rang their own doorbell. As emphasis, I guess.


This one goes so far beyond 'mixed metaphor' that no English language word exists to describe it:


"Let's make this a time of harvest, and may the fruits of our labors be ladders our children can use to climb the stairs to the stars."(2)
Speaker of the House John Boehner (Really, I'm not shitting you)


OK, right. So they harvest...ladders. Which, I imagine, is some kind of vine, or maybe a root crop. Maybe he thinks it's a kind of tree. (What would one use to climb ladder trees? Piles of tomatoes?)
Perhaps they grow straight up out of the ground like asparagus.
But I digress.
Boehner then seems to want to give these (organically raised?) ladders to children, who will somehow use them to climb stairs. Ladders...kids...stairs. What could possibly go wrong? My nieces and nephews can't carry glasses of juice (definitely organic) up the stairs without spilling them. So, ladders? But, let it go. Once the children have used the ladders, they reach the stairs. To the stars. A perfectly acceptable form of interstellar travel. That is, for those of us raised on fairy tales, instead of science.


Notes


1- Steve King quoted in: Robert Costa Conservatives Shrug off Bush and Romney, Remain Confident in Base-Friendly Hopefuls Washington Post 1/14/15


2- John Boehner quoted in: Dana Milbank Mitch McConnell is off to a Bitter Start Washington Post 1/7/15


Postscript:
I wrestled mightily with the temptation to work a Led Zeppelin reference in to the second quote. This postscript is proof that I was not entirely successful.

Art of the Possible

Well, congress is back in session. Mitch McConnell has finally come up with a winning strategy for the Reepubs: Deny Obama a third term.


I think he's got a shot.